Soldier's Insanity

The rain pelted down on the earth, drenching everything under its merciless assault. I can’t differentiate the sounds of what’s man-made or nature. The gunshots, ricochet of bullets hid behind the splattering of the water droplets. Suddenly there was a blinding flash of light…

“BOOM”

Was that thunder? No, I thought to myself. The trees don’t shiver in fear when thunder rolls. It was an explosion… and it was close. Taking aim at a moving shadow, I held my breath and squeezed the trigger. The rifle recoiled against my shoulder as it shot off a round and reloaded itself. Let the sun set faster please. The longer the twilight last, the more I see of my enemies’ faces. From behind what was a mini bus before it got wrecked from an air strike, another trooper ran menacingly towards my position. I saw his features before the inevitable happened. A dozen ghostly faces bearing similarities to the original appeared as a bullet penetrated his skull from the forehead and ended the last sprint in his life. Damn it! I cursed under my breath while returning to my cover. The faces of the ghosts belonged to the dead soldier’s family. My imagination goes into overdrive, creating faces that bore features to the one I’m about to kill. Guilt feels my wretched heart with every life I take. I fight for my loved ones and so do my enemies. I held my rifle close to my chest while I half dragged a young private behind. The poor kid’s shaken up badly. He was shot in the leg. A ghastly wound bleeding profusely exposing a splintered femur bone. No screams… am I dragging a hopeless corpse? He’s still panting. The adrenaline rushing into his brain must have shut out the pain from his brain. It won’t last long... I found a wall that’s still standing under the barrage of war. Without second thoughts, I pushed him behind the safety of the wall and took aim for any enemy soldiers in our trail.

“Ma….mummy…” came a soft whimpering. Looking back at the wounded soldier behind me, I lowered my rifle. He started frantically scratching against his left breast pocket. He was trying to pull out his issued bandage; obviously the numbness is ebbing away from his consciousness. Unbuttoning his pocket, I took out the packed bandage and ripped away the covers from the white gauze. Choking back his tears, the soldier trembled as I applied pressure on his wound to stop the bleeding. It was a futile as using cotton wool to plug a running tap. Thick red liquid gushed out of the gruesome cavity soaking the bandage as most immediately. “Medic!” I shouted over the din.

The soldier was sobbing uncontrollably as he pulled out my side arm and shoved the barrel into his mouth. I was too late when I turned my attention back to him. Blood smeared my face as a gaping hole appeared at the back of his head. “Perfect waste of ammo” I spat. I emptied the dead kid’s webbing of remaining ammunitions and ordinance before re-embarking on my guilt trip. I don’t want my kid to go through war. I don’t want my loved ones to live with angst and heartache. I have to eliminate any threats to that and survive. With renewed vigor and a fresh magazine, I charged straight for the front line.

Saturday Blog

Its the weekends again. Just one more month to go before my return to Singapore. Never thought I'd say this but I do miss everyone. I miss the activities that I can do in Singapore like going for wakeboarding and sing Karaoke (the clean kind...) Not that I didn't cherish Singapore but I just didn't realise that I'm really that fortunate to be living in Singapore. The other thing I hate about working in Brunei is having to deal with the locals. Language barrier is one thing. I think I'll be taking Bahasa lessons soon. The country's system really needs to get some getting used to. I suppose the difference is because Brunei is under patriach sovereignity. The Sultan gives kids free education and a monthly allowance of 100 bucks for stationary! Being born in the correct family can do a lot of good for your life in Brunei. In Singapore, it doesn't really matter if you have poor parents. If you put enough effort into it, you can still make a mark for yourself.

Enough about Brunei, my stay here will be long so I'll have plenty of chances to make the comparions. Just yesterday, (was a public holiday in Brunei) I had to work because there was a briefing for the personnel in RSAF. I re-acquainted myself with the typical singaporean speech. I've noticed before while I was an instructor in Signal Institute that quite a number of Singaporeans punctuated their sentences with Oks and Ks. If I got a dollar from every ok I hear during these 'lectures' I won't even have to buy Toto to become a millionare. I'm not kidding here. I've actually done the counting during one of these speechs before (I was bored...) An hour's worth of 'public speaking' would be decorated with at least 100-200 Oks and Ks. Imagine earning a hundred bucks just for listening to people say oks for and hour.

(P.S: Noticed how my English standard have deteriorated? I've been listening and conversing in broken English regularly for a month... I hope my spelling is still intact...)

New Laptop

Alright, I've finally gotten my hands on a new laptop. This little baby cost me a bomb. Literally blowing my pay away. At least with Trevor (Acer Travelmate... so call it Trevor) around, I don't have to stay in the office to do mundane paper work. Just copy over from my office computer and off I go back into my bunk. Besides, my PC has been throwing tantrums like a spoilt kid. She must have known that I'm going to get a laptop and just wants to grab as much attention while she can.

Anyway, Trev is my new asociate in blogging. I don't have to borrow laptops or wait for a computer terminal with internet connection anymore. At least every weekend I'll get to bring Trev out to a cafe or foodcourt with free wireless broadband and I'll be able to get online. Won't be so convenient in camp though as I still need a telephone line to dial up. Can't you believe it? I have to use 56k dial up here and it costs 1 ringgit per hour! What the economy needs is some competition. The service isn't impressive and the price tag is exorbitant.

Nonetheless, I'll be saving some money on entertainment as well. I don't need to buy a TV or DVD player or PS or XBOX etc... A laptop is almost like an all in one machine. I can play DVDs, make phone calls play games, download books to read.

Ok, that's all for this week.

Quiz again

So Fifi has started the ball rolling so I might as well keep it going on. Heh heh.


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RE: Stuck in my Head

Was checking my blog comments for my previous postings and realised..... OEI! NO BODY SO MUCH EVEN OFFERED TO HOLD MY HAND! MY HAND GOK DIO SAI AH? NOT LIKE YOUR HAND WILL ROT AND FALL OFF AFTER HOLDING MINE. DON'T WANT TO HOLD ALSO BLUFF ME WITH SOME EXCUSE LAH.

I'm go SOC liao. Its not standard obstacle course....its sulk one corner.

Rantings from an idle man.

I'm bored bored bored bored. Today's a public holiday cos its the first day of Ramadan or the fasting month for the Muslims. So different from Singapore. Its usually a quiet affair and most of the ignorant will only know about Ramadan after its over. Not that they're making a big hoo haa about it here though. Usually on Sundays and public holidays, there are plenty of shops that won't open for business. Its almost like they don't need the business or the weekend crowds.

Which brings me to another issue. The crowds usually appear at the end of the months around the 20th to 30th or 31st. What happens to the crowds after that? They go low on cash, so they try not to come out altogether. At least that's what I'm told. Imagine a whole nation that goes shopping around the same time and stay home around the same time. So different from back home sia... In Singapore its usually crowded or extremely crowded or the Kanninabehlacannotevensqueezethru crowd which usually happens around Christmas and New Year (including the CNY one...)

What I'm going to do the moment I land in Changi's dearly missed terminals? I'm going to get myself a Burger King® meal and bite into some real beef patties. Abstain from pork I can live with but don't deprive me from good quality beef. If beef patties are sub-standard here, what do you think the steaks are like? Ok all this talk about food is getting me hungry... going to smoke...at least the cigarettes are cheap and imported from US.